i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize