i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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