im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Do vagina's smell?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
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