went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
