Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
