I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
