it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
