Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
