I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
our cab driver is having phone sex.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
