finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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