wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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