Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
he fucked my hip out of place.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
did i just pee glitter
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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