I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize