I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
