I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
