i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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