fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
You ate ashes out of my bong
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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