i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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