YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
