Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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