I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize