I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
