Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
