does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
