I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
