he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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