Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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