So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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