She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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