Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
