I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
