I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I wanna passion pit in your ass
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize