You smell like stripper and shame
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
