And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Boobs speak an international language.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
how drunk are you?
Several
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
