so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Your penis caused this!
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