Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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