what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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