Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
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