he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize