I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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