This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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