so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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