Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
