now i know why i became what i already was.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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