The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
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