what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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