hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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