Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
