Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
