i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
