Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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