Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
When did angry sex become our thing?
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Randomize
