Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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