Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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